Episode LIII Sunday, July 18th, 2020 The Citadel in Toronto, Ontario
3 ON 1 HANDICAP MATCH Ultramega UK & El Caliente Loco vs Kai D. Oh Crybaby announced that this match would be contested under tornado tag rules, so all Ultramega UK and El Caliente Loco would all be in the ring at the same time, not that it mattered to the 'Dragon God' who instantly took the tag team out with a stiff double lariat which sent them rolling to the floor, leaving just him and El Caliente Loco in the ring together, the plucky luchadore took a swing at Kai who just copped it on the chin and laughed, egging him on to go again, El Caliente Loco does exactly that, except this time Kai catches his hand and stares bullets at the luchadore... before grabbing him in a belly to belly and THROWING HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE, SENDING HIM CRASHING INTO ULTRAMEGA UK ON THE FLOOR! Kai laughs at the carnage he has caused, before rolling to the outside and grabbing El Caliente, throwing him back into the ring and hitting him with the Tatsumaki (Batista Bomb) for the 1, 2... but he lifts up the luchadores head, holding him by the mask, breaking the count, before then locking him in the Boro Breath (Batista Bite) which caused him to instantly tap out, but the 'Dragon God' just laughed, not letting the hold go until El Caliente Loco passed out, then the hold was released. Kai D. Oh defeats Ultramega UK & El Caliente Loco via submission at 1:15
We go to Matt Shields lounging in a large black leather reclining massager, wearing a pair of red velvet cheetah print pajama pants, no shirt, the Oath World Title just casually sitting between his legs, Dr Pepper in one hand, whiskey on the side table.
SHIELDS: Howdy fuckos. It’s me, the guy that holds this thing that claims to be a World Championship, but without a soul, with Blanch gone, this thing is just a horrible reminder of all that I lost. So why keep it, why show up on TV this week, via satellite because that’s all I have to do until management decides it’s time to make money on me again. Book me, I’ll show up, probably beat whoever is put in front of me, but off chance someone gets a win, boom number one contender. Maybe you assholes can get the title on someone you want, I can be free of this burden and take on my rightful role as the motherfucking boogeyman this place needs. The king of the god damned, brualizer of the barbarians, teacher of torment, The Walking Goddamn horror movie. I’ve been beaten, broken, bloodied, but ain’t never been put down. So someone needs to step up to the next damn level. Just because I don’t care about this soulless hunk of metal and leather, doesn’t mean I’m just giving it away. You have to beat my ass to fucking death if you think I’ll allow anyone to take my property, whether it’s with five million or five cents like the stupid tin plates. I ain’t no bitch.
Shields looks over at his whiskey, pours the glass just about half full, then fills the rest with Dr. Pepper and takes a sip.
SHIELDS: Kash, I cancelled all but the radio interview here in Dallas, and that’s it. If you want me to do Canadian fucking media, you book me on the shows so I have a reason to come up there. I’m not leaving my fucking mansion to go up to Canada if I don’t have a fight. All I have up there is this cabin. Sure it’s fucking sweet and has a natural hot springs, but I have better here. Remember, I’m the most important person on this show. Belt or not.
Shields takes another sip and flips the bird as we slowly fade to black.
SINGLES MATCH
Josie Wales vs Tyler Matthews w/ All Eyez On Us Crybaby announced this match had a fifteen minute time limit. A couple minutes in, Tyler looked for the 'Off With Her Head' (Discus Lariat from the Corner) but Josie was able to move out of the way and counter with a beautiful Northern Lights Suplex for a near fall, with Tyler throwing the shoulder up at the last second. Josie wasn't going to let Tyler get a break though, and instantly went back on the offensive, picking him up and throwing him to the apron, tyler got back to his feet and Josie went for a Superkick, but Tyler was able to counter it, hitting her in the stomach with his shoulder then connecting with the Killshot (Slingshot DDT) for another near fall. Josie was able to make her comeback though, connecting with a Superkick followed by a jumping DDT which planted Tyler on the top of his head, she goes to the corner and calls for him to get to his feet, which he does, she charges in and connects with a massive Bicycle Kick with staggers him back into the ropes, on the rebound she catches him and is able to lift and plant him with the Rio Lobo Driver (Quackendriver III) for the 1, 2, 3! Josie Wales defeats Tyler Matthews via pinfall at 9:36
As the cameras start up in a darkened basement, all that is visible is a beat up wrestling ring. We hear footsteps draw closer towards the camera, until we can see the former holder of the Skeleton Key, 'The Fallen Saint', AJ Jenkynx. JENKYNX: Everything happens for a reason right? I faced my mentor FM Young and lost the Skeleton Key. However, after the match... the World Champion Matt Shields decided to attack me… I have faced many champions since my career started.. But I'm curious as to why the world champ attacked me. So I've got a question Shields did you attack me so you can prove something to FM Young or what? For the past fucking year I've been in OATH, I went from talentless to talented and I'm sick of the disrespect. Soon I will prove why I am the future in this business.. and why I've got the fans behind my back.. So soon Shields and everybody else who questions me, I will show them exactly why I'M called 'THE FALLEN FUCKING SAINT'... AND I'M COMING BACK INTO ANY TITLE PICTURE. See you soon people…
The camera opens to Stephanie “Cloud” Matsuda standing backstage on her own. She’s staring at the camera with a serious expression on her face while dressed in her ring gear.
MATSUDA: It’s no secret that things haven’t been going my way since OATH’s been reloaded. I lost the Intrepid Championship and now all roads are cut off to get it back. I won’t lie - I haven’t been myself lately. But instead of crying about falling from grace, I’m going to do what I do best and get back into the fire. Now everyone knows I’ve held nearly every title here on OATH other than the world championship. But I’m not ready yet. But tonight, one of my biggest rivals in Azumi Goto is going to help me find that fire I once had.
Stephanie narrows her eyes as the camera closes in on her face
MATSUDA: Once I defeat Goto, I’m going to work my way back up the roster and do whatever it takes to become OATH World Champion. Rome wasn’t built in a day, but I can be a patient woman.
Matsuda smiles and walks off camera.
SINGLES MATCH
Stephanie Matsuda vs Azumi Goto Crybaby announced that this singles contest would have a twenty minute time limit, Matuda and Goto traded reversals for about a minute, showing off that they're both experienced in the ring, and have history against each other. This isn't their first rodeo. Matsuda looks to connect with the Special Delivery (Package Piledriver) about five minutes into this contest, but Azumi is able to counter it, spin out of it, and hit Matsuda with a devastating Backdrop Suplex! Azumi continues with this offence, hitting a roundhouse kick that knocks Matsuda to the outside, Azumi is quick to capitalise though, and runs off the opposite ropes and hits the Sasuke Special to a massive pop from the crowd! She picks Matsuda up and throws her in the ring, Matsuda slowly gets to her feet, and as she does Azumi charges i nand hits her with the Last Surprise (Slingblade)! Hey, wait a minute! Stephanie normally does that! Azumi hooks the leg but Stephanie kicks out at two! Stephanie is able to fight her way back into this match though, however, as Azumi goes to hit her with the Heaven's Flash (Superkick), Stephanie is able to sidestep it and hit her with the Yahtzee (Superkick)! Azumi falls back, but Stephanie picks her back up and goes behind her, locking in a sleeper hold! Azumi tries to get herself free but Stephanie is able to connect with the Blasian Suplex (Sleeper Suplex), for the 1, 2, 3! Stephanie Matsuda defeats Azumi Goto via pinfall at 17:41
We open up to see one half of the OATH Tag Team Champions, Alex Andrews, sitting on a production crate. Her championship belt sprawled across her lap. Alex flashes a small smile on her face as she looks up at the camera. ALEX: That's what The Social Elite does. That is how they operate. They will take any opportunity, any shortcut in order to get what they want. And you know what they want now? Alex taps her finger along the faceplate of that belt. ALEX: This right here. They want to add these belts to their collection. I quite understand that fact. And I fully understand what lengths they are willing to go to pry them away from Kallie and myself. Alex shakes her head. ALEX: But I'm coming into this thing prepared. This won't be the first time I've stepped in the ring with your ilk. You'll stoop to any level to get what you want and call it being the smarter wrestler, being the ultimate opportunist. But you see, I'll be ready. We'll be ready for you. Because as much as y'all have been having fun being rich bitches, Kallie and I train. Wrestling is our lives. It is our livelihoods and we take this VERY seriously. And o, Kallie and myself, we are a man good tag team. One of the best this company has seen, and we're not done yet proving that point. We know what you're all about ladies, and we'll be ready for you. Question is, will you be ready for us? You weren't last time, that's why we hold these belts. Thinking you can overcome us this time? She smiles again as she hops up off the product crate, tossing her championship over her shoulder. ALEX: Take a good hard look at this, ladies. Cause I'm going to show you exactly why I am Lady Limitless. We've seen what lengths you'll go to to win. Now you'll see what I will do. Alex smiles and starts to walk away. She gets the the end of the hallway where Kallie is standing waiting on her. KALLIE: You ready? ALEX: Always.
SINGLES MATCH
Alex Andrews w/ Kallie Reznik vs Angel Kash w/ Summer & Tiffany Lynn Page Crybaby announced that this contest would have a twenty minute time limit, and to start the match Alex went in to try and end it early, charging and picking Angel up and driving her into the corner. Driving her shoulder into the stomach of Angel, before then picking her up, and quickly connecting with a Backdrop Driver for a veeeery close two count! As Alex continued to stay on the offensive, the numbers game that the Social Elite have begin to come to play. Tiffany jumped on the apron to try and distract the referee, but Kallie was able to stop her, but the referees attention was drawn to the pair of them, and not to Summer Page, who has climbed into the ring to try and take out Alex. Alex turns around and sees Summer, who goes to try and clock Alex upside the head with a bottle of champagne... but Alex is able to dodge out the way! She rebounds off the ropes and connects with the Elysium (Running Bicycle Kick)! But as she's taken her eyes off Angel, she's had time to recover, and connects with a hair pull, slamming Alex down to the mat! Angel continues the offence for a couple minutes, stretching the rules as thin as she can, she connects with the Buyout (Implant DDT) for a close two count! Angel hits the mat in frustration, clearly thinking that would put Alex down. As she goes to pick her up, Alex suddenly bursts up and connects a massive forearm that sends the 'Trillion Dollar Princess' stumbling, Alex uses this time to bounce off the ropes and hit Angel with the Elysium (Running Bicycle Kick), but she's not done there, and she sets her up in perfect position for the Brain Death (Step Up Axe Kick)! Alex hooks the legs and gets the 1, 2, 3! Alex Andrews defeats Angel Kash via pinfall at 15:41
To The Back we go where Kendrick Bingham is standing beside Minoru Tanahashi who is sporting some strange gear, clad in a full body, black singlet with rainbow claw marks all over it and the words El Gran León on the ass as he gives a little spin, then shows a gold mask with a black lion’s mane and markings, as well as teeth.
TANAHASHI: Hola mi amigo Kendrick
BINGHAM: You speak Spanish?
TANAHASHI: Un poco. Estoy oxidado. I can still remember how to ask important thing. Baño, baile, bebida y quiero ir.
BINGHAM: Well that is really cool, but why bring it up tonight?
Minoru looks at Kendrick and seems shocked and appalled as he sort of backs away, but his legs don’t move so it’s more like a strange lean.
TANAHASHI: Because I am facing, El Diablo Blanco, the white devil himself. Yea that’s right… wait wait wait, Does he know that’s what his name translates to? My lucha Name was El Gran León, though I was El León Negro at first. Okay wow, yea I thought it would be fun to dust out the old gear for tonight. El Gran León versus El Diablo Blanco. We’re both fun guys, this should be a great match.
BINGHAM: Any concern that the crowd might like him a little bit more than you?
Tanahashi again looks at him shocked and again does the strange lean, then laughs a little bit.
TANAHASHI: If they do, they do. As I said, we are both fun guys. We are also both know how to get the job done in the ring. Both of us are former Livewire champions, he’s a former Tabula Rasa, I’m a former tag. Those things don’t happen just by being fun or being well liked. El D, you got a little weight on me, I got a little height on you. Years wise you may have more time than me, but you ain’t got as much experience as me big buddy. 20 years in the backyards wrestling for hotdogs and handshakes, it’s not the same as a decade of experience. Going through the dojos, travelling the World, wrestling all different types of people in all different types of matches with all different types of styles. No knock on you El D. You did it for fun on the weekends, probably got enough from it to take your wife and kids out to TGI Fridays, and worked a normal job. Then push came to shove, you chased the dream and you’re here buddy. I am expecting one hell of a match, but I am also expecting to win. It’s nothing personal El D, but I’m gonna have to outclass you tonight and continue to show everyone why I am the next Intrepid Champion, and that is no joke, unlike Allen Cheney.
Minoru smirks and fires the finger guns, oh wait, the middle finger guns. Minoru moonwalks away, maybe looking to dispel any rumors of a damaged knee.
SINGLES MATCH
Minoru Tanahashi vs El Diablo Blanco Crybaby announces that this match has a twenty minute time limit, then when the bell rings Minoru and El Diablo meet in the center of the ring and size each other up, almost like if, let's say, a rock and, for the sake of this comparison, something immortal, were standing face to face, soaking in the ovation of the crowd, before Minoru lays into El D with a vicious chop! El D looks up and says "Is that all you got, brother?" before giving Minoru a chop of his own, the pair go back and forth in this chop exchange, Minoru coming out on top, giving El D three back to back to back chops, quickly followed up by a kick to the gut, hooking both arms and going to lift El D... BUT HIS LEGS BUCKLE! Minoru falls backwards and the Backyard Phenom lands on top of him with a seated senton! A couple minutes go by and El D is firmly in control. He has Minoru in the corner and gestures to the crowd, they all go crazy for him, who wouldn't? He hits Minoru with a punch in the corner... CROWD: ONE! ...then another... CROWD: TWO! ...then continues the flurry of punches as the crowd chants along with it! CROWD: THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE!.... TEN! As the tenth punch lands, Minoru staggers out the corner and flops to the floor. El D hooks the leg and gets a two count. After some more offence from The Backyard Phenom, he goes for a Hurricanrana that looks like it connects, but the Black Lion had other ideas, rolling through back to his feet and taking El D out with a 'rana of his own! Followed by an arm drag, then another, and quickly followed by another 'rana that sends El D to the floor, but Minoru doesn't let him catch his breath, as he charges off the ropes and connects with a Tope Con Hilo! Minoru and El D battle back into the ring, with Minoru connecting with the Kabukicho Nights (Discus Lariat), and quickly followed up by Minoru hooking both arms, now I'm not sure if this is a good idea, seeing how the last time went... BUT HE CONNECTS WITH THE BLACK TIGER BOMB THIS TIME! He powers through the pain and plants El D for the 1, 2, 3! Minoru Tanahashi defeats El Diablo Blanco via pinfall at 18:51 After the match is over, El D pulls himself up in the corner, Minoru sees this and goes over to him, extending his hand, El D accepts the hand shake, both of them give each other a nod of respect as El D rolls out of the ring... when the camera pans back to the ring we can see that Minoru has a microphone in his hand. TANAHASHI: Anyone want to hear a knock knock joke? What? No? They're even more old and played out than Allen Chaney? Oh no no more old and worn out than Allen Chaney's fleshlight. Oh damn, this is definitely not a PG-13 show anymore. Guess that means I can say, fuck you Allen Chaney. El Diablo Blanco has way more balls and talent than you do, and I'm coming for the Intrepid Title you big bearded Bitch! As Tanahashi dropped the microphone, he gets jumped from behind by Allen Chaney! Chaney drops his championship belt, picks Minoru up... AND PLANTS HIM WITH THE PUNCHLINE, ONTO THE INTREPID CHAMPIONSHIP! After the devastating Punchline on top of his title belt, Allen grabs the microphone and sits next to Minoru on the mat.
CHANEY: Alright you dumb fucks let’s clear this up… Excuse my negativity but there’s nothing a Comedian hates more than having to explain a joke but since no one here understands parody or satire I guess it’s time for comedy 101.
Allen takes his cell phone out of his pocket and holds it up for everyone to see.
CHANEY: I get all kinds of shit on twitter for claiming my loss to Stephanie doesn’t count because I got my win back and that my DQ loss last week doesn’t count either… and you all just didn’t fuckin get it. Claiming I’m some delusional idiot. Well let me give you a peek into how my mind works.
Allen taps his phone to his head.
CHANEY: I am well aware that I lost. At the end of the day no one gives two tugs of Ben Petrie’s shrimp dick about who cheated or how they lost or if it was a DQ unless it fits their narrative. You all boo me because even after I ate a pin I carry on this charade that I’m undefeated but I’m doing it to point out YOUR hypocrisy.
The crowd loudly boos Allen and he seems to enjoy it thoroughly.
CHANEY: Because you see… this dipshit whose skull I mighta just fractured lost to me CLEANLY and CLEARLY within the parameters of the match we were in and he goes to twitter to make excuses. He had the upper hand! Allen just ran out the clock! You LOST, Minoru. Just like I did before I won my title back. But these people all buy into it because it fits their narrative. And now they’ve all been called out on it. YOU, Minoru have been called out on it… and now all that’s left is for me to give you the receipt.
Allen crawls over and looks down at the fallen Minoru. Minoru, barely lucid after the piledriver tries to put his hand up to almost push Allen’s face away from him but Allen swats it away and looks dead in his eyes.
CHANEY: I want these people to continue cheering and feeding your LIE, Mino. I want them to fill your heart with all their hope and positive energy and good-time feelings… so I can tear that heart right out of your chest and eat it right in front of them, then make them watch as I shit all of their wasted hope on your excuses. There will be no excuse when you take your next shot at this title. I am not going to play with my food. I’m gonna beat your ass… and as much as I’d love to stomp your face into MY Intrepid Championship with a Heckler Control to cap this all off… I don’t want to concuss you. I want you to remember all this. Mino, I want you to remember what a hypocrite and a liar you are and then I want you to realize what a failure you are about to be. Setup. Punchline.
Allen drops the microphone and rolls out of the ring with his Intrepid Championship, basking in the boos from the crowd as he makes his way to the back.
We enter on Liz Karlson, the OATH Livewire Championship on her right shoulder. She’s got the belt plate fully revealed, dressed in her Dead to Rights denim jacket and ring gear. She points two fingers to the plate, and then sighs.
KARLSON: Making me get a bit too sober for my liking for this contest, Switch. That’s just how it goes, though.
Karlson smiles as she thinks of her next words.
KARLSON: I haven’t forgotten, even if the fans have. You were my first defense after I pried this thing out of the bossman’s iron grip. You were the guy who showed up and tried to shut my rise down before, tried to cut me off in my prime, show that my win over Kash was a fluke. Now, you’ve gotten forgotten, and I’ve risen further. I’ve beaten legend after legend to solidify my place here at the very fucking top...and I’m not letting myself falter just yet.
Karlson taps the plate.
KARLSON: I carried this belt when OATH was shut down, I wore it on my shoulder or around my waist to every company I went into, every show that I wrestled on, OATH was there in some fucking physical form, some spirit. You slunk back into your shitholes and you weren’t willing to carry this on your back. Now, you want it. Now, after months of dormancy, after months of me being the standard-bearer, you want it.
She shakes her head.
KARLSON: Not happening. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever. Bring your fuckin’ fighting boots, because the minute we get into the ring, it’s on sight. I’ll cave your fuckin’ head in and toss you around like the sack of shit you are. I respect you, Switch, but tonight? I’m gonna end you.
She holds two fingers high. KARLSON: Good luck, buddy.
We cut to black.
• MAIN EVENT •
LIVEWIRE CHAMPIONSHIP
SINGLES MATCH
SWITCHBLXDE vs Liz Karlson©
Crybaby announced this as our main event of the evening, and will be contested within a thirty minute time limit. To start us off the pair circled each other, having wrestled once before they know a thing or two about each other. Switch looks to come in and go for a lockup, which Liz also does, until Switch fakes it at the last second and flips Liz the bird directly in her face, to a mass off boos from the crowd, Liz responds in kind by slapping the taste out of his mouth. Switch goes to swing at her but Liz is able to duck it and go around, trying to go for a German suplex early, but Switch is able to use the size difference to his advantage, escaping the attempted German and shooting her off the ropes, before flattening her with a vicious lariat before going on the offensive with a flurry of forearms and open hand chops, Liz covers up well enough to where the referee doesn't stop the fight, in fact she's able to evade one of the strikes and catch another and straight up fucking deck Switch with a left hand that splits his lip. As Liz and Switch continue to brawl, a couple minutes in we see Switch shoot off the ropes, BUT LIZ CATCHES HIM AND LOOKS FOR THE SPIN CYCLE (Sitout Spinebuster), but Switch is able to adjust his body and CATCH LIZ WITH A CUTTER! Liz is down and out on the mat, Switch sees this as his opportunity to try and get the win and climbs to the top rope, looking for the Dumpster Dive (Diving Senton Bomb), he leaps... and Liz moves out the way! Switch crashes hard on the mat, Liz catches her breath as Switch gets himself to a hunched over position in the center of the ring, and Liz goes over to him and connects with a BRUTAL deadlift sitout powerbomb, before picking Switch back up, hunching him over, and charging off the ropes, connecting with the 3xF (Step up Axe Kick)! She hooks the legs... 1... 2... ! SWITCH KICKS OUT! Somehow Switch was able to get himself out of that situation. Liz is in shock. She looks down at Switch, who is barely moving at this point, and picks him back up, looking to end it once and for all, shooting off the ropes... BUT SWITCH CATCHES HER WITH THE MAINLINER (Feint Big Boot followed by Spinning Back Elbow)! Both of them are down! The referee starts his mandatory 10 count, reaching 7 before either of them start to get back to their feet, as he gets to 9 both of them are back on their feet. They look at each other from across the ring and the crowd start growing louder and louder until they both charge each other! Switch geos for the Mainliner but Liz rolls underneath the boot, Switch stumbles and Liz catches him on the jaw with a Bicycle Knee strike that sends him back into the corner, as she charges in again he catches her with a back elbow that staggers her, followed up by the Sharpnado (Tornado DDT)! He looks down at her and decides to go big again, climbing the turnbuckles, only to be distracted by someone making their presence known at the top of the ramp, Jenna Sharpe. Switch calls out to her, telling her "Fuck off! What the fuck do you think you're doin' out here?" This momentary lack of concentration is enough for Liz to get back to her feet, getting Switch on her shoulders in an electric chair position, nailing him with the Three Story Trip (Rubix Cube) for the 1, 2, 3! Liz Karlson defeats SWITCHBLXDE via pinfall at 22:46 After the bell has been rung, Jenna comes down to the ring and gets on the apron, Liz takes note of this as the ref hands her the championship, looking at Jenna. Jenna points at the title, saying she deserves another shot. Liz looks at her, and the title, but by this time, Switch is back on his feet, holding his neck, getting in the face of Jenna, Liz just finds this all humorous. As the two Sharpe family members continue their screaming match, "Close Your Eyes (And Count To Fuck) starts playing out the speakers to a massive amount of boos, as the new partial owner of OATH, Kasey Kash makes his way out to the top of the stage, Microphone in hand. KASH: Aight, aight, aight. I've had e-fucking-nough of you two comin out and screwin' each other out of this title shot. The way I see it, there's a veeeery simple solution to this problem you two have. The crowd start to hype up a bit, predicting what Kasey is gonna say. Jenna, Switch and Liz are all looking at Kash as he pauses for dramatic effect. KASH: Liz, you ARE going to defend your championship again at the next conviction, hell, we'll even do theme the show around your Carnival of Violence thing that was pitched before I took up the reigns. And you'll be defending the Livewire Championship against Switchblxde... CROWD: BOOOOOOOOOO! KASH: ...AND Jenna Sharpe! The crowd erupt in cheers as all three of them look between each other, and then at the Livewire Championship, which Liz holds high above her head to end the show.
Results: • Kai D. Oh def Ultramega UK & El Caliente Loco
• Josie Wales def. Tyler Matthews • Stephanie Matsuda def. Azumi Goto
• Alex Andrews def. Angel Kash • Minoru Tanahashi def. El Diablo Blanco
• Liz Karlson def. SWITCHBLXDE; STILL Livewire Champion